Close to The Edge of Nothing: Alex in Alaska / A collection curated by Alex in Wonderland

		Musings on a Thursday Night... Alex in Wonderland
ROLL | SEE ALL Untitled entry Absent (Noticeably?) Falling... Stop! Hammer time... Northern Lights Medicine Changes Musings on a Thursday Night... The deadlines are coming! The deadlines are coming! Scary Moons		Hours before my flight was set to leave Los Angeles I sat in my bed trying to think deep thoughts. I desperately wanted to make some sort of peace with the moment, to have a grand epiphany before I arrived at my new life. It seems that excitement and sadness often seem to arrive together, each trying to outshine the other. As I flew over snow covered mountains hours later I began to push the sadness aside and tried to dive into the anticipation, as I often do. This lasted a few weeks into my stay here in Alaska until one day homesickness hit me hard. I glanced around and the absence of people,lights and oddly enough, tall buildings, affected me more than the presence of so much foliage and the light smattering of snow. It made me think of how what isn't there can often have more of an impact that what actually is. It's the old problem of noticing what you lack but not realizing what is right in front of you. Later though as I settled into Alaskan life I realized that I never get the urge to run up here. In Los Angeles, because of all those people and all those buildings, sometimes I would look out and feel the strongest urge to run far away from everyone and everything. To just talk to the world that housed me, uninterrupted by others. Up here you're so close to the edge of nothing that you actually believe that if you start to run, you may never find your way back. It's strange but this knowledge is comforting in a way. It's sort of like discovering the boundaries of this world and deeply respecting them. Posted Thursday, October 22, 2009 at 10:04PM | Leave a comment